(This is actually not something on my original 'God and ______' list, but it keeps coming to mind over the past 24 hours so here it is...)
One of the awesome things about my job and the church I'm serving at right now is that I've been able to be pretty involved in my son's school life. This is something I have NEVER taken for granted because I know most fathers (and for that matter these days most parents period) aren't able to be at a lot of their kids' stuff at school and so forth these days. Since he was in kindergarten (now in 2nd grade), I've been very fortunate to be able to make it to most of the awards assemblies, class parties, programs, and other activities. I also get to eat in the cafeteria with him several times a year as well, and sometimes that also includes playing out on the playground for part of recess with him and his friends. I also get to take him a lot and pick him up most days. I've been able to connect with a lot of the kids his age, and over time a lot of them have grown to really like having me around.
The past two weeks, I've been able to be at both performances of his 2nd grade class play (A.M. for the school, P.M. for the parents), subbed in his class for 90 minutes while the school honored all the teachers, and made it to his class Christmas party. The last two were 2 days apart. In the hour and a half I had them on Wednesday, I had a little bit of stuff the teacher left us to do while she was out, and had to be a little more authoritative than I had hoped for in order to show them they couldn't get by with just anything. Ultimately, as usually happens in youth group as well, it earned respect, even if they may not have liked it at first.
On Friday, when I was there for the Christmas party, all the kids knew me and were like "you again?" and were picking at me, and I at them as well. Here's the crux of this entry...one little boy, one of the few I didn't know before Wednesday, told my son, over and over again, "Your dad is so cool," which brought a smile to my face. A few minutes later, he made this statement, "I wish you were my dad." I don't know this kid's family situation at all, but hearing that brought with it a jumbled maze of emotions. It reminded me, yet again, that kids are watching me, and that I have a tremendous responsibility and a tremendous opportunity. It also humbled me. I'm far from perfect, but this kid obviously saw something he wished he had. It reminded me that we all have the potential to make an impact on really everyone we encounter because people are watching us.
The question is this: what kind of impact are we making...as believers, as role models, as husbands, as fathers, as ministers, as students, as family members? In that moment, that simple statement from a kid I barely knew, humbled me, and gave me joy and heartache both. It is by far not the first time something like that has been said around me...in fact I had a student in my youth group say something similar even today...and I don't always know exactly what to do with it. But I do know this: it is my job, and each of ours, to do the best we can, in every moment and every situation we are alive in, to impact others in a positive way rather than a negative one, because we never know who is watching or what type of lasting, and perhaps even eternal, impact God could choose to use us to have on them.
Soundtrack for a note: "Volume I" by She and Him
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